I pride myself on my ability to remain positive... to see the silver lining always. While that is a great way to look at life I have also recognized the importance of being realistic in that optimism.
It is easy for most of us to "remain calm" when things are going
well--going "our" way. It is much more difficult to remain calm when there is turmoil, rocky roads or thunderstorms.
While it is good to recognize the silver lining (the positive in whatever the situation may be), it is important to remember the silver lining surrounds a cloud.
Clouds are good--necessary even. Water is essential to life, survival. They provide shade from the heat. We can look up at the clouds and make out shapes, get lost in their movement, become mesmerized--entranced even.
Before you know it, the cloud can become a thunderstorm and you are stuck in the thunder, lightning and rain. Quickly, you can be overcome by the tempest and trapped.
So it is in life. I still like to look up at the clouds. I still like to get lost in their every-changing beauty. I still like to see the silver lining. I also, now, make sure to remind myself it is a cloud. I make sure I am not getting too caught in the wonder to recognize the whole picture. The cloud may drift by harmlessly, making way for another, but it may also turn into something more sinister. I’m not LOOKING for things to go bad, I am realistically staying aware of the whole picture. Don’t stay on edge, but don’t be surprised either.
If, however, you find yourself caught in the storm all you can do is deal with the circumstances RIGHT NOW. You can’t beat yourself up for what you did or didn’t do. That won’t change. You can take a lesson to use in the future, but you can’t do anything about that right now either. All you can do is get out of the rain. Or… accept that it is raining and let the storm be a form of cleansing. Either way, stay calm. The storm will pass whether you deal with it calmly or freak out. It may be quick. It may be long. You don’t know. All you have is right now.
Rain or shine. Good or bad. Smooth sailing or rough waters. You can’t change how you got to where you are. You can’t predict where you’re going to end up or when it is going to end. All you can do is take a deep breath and deal with right now.